


Normal Person

by Felloffalot



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing
Genre: Alternate Universe, Autism, F/F, Strangers to Lovers, Trust Issues
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-05
Updated: 2019-06-05
Packaged: 2020-04-05 23:41:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,265
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19050859
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Felloffalot/pseuds/Felloffalot
Summary: For a person like Himiko, trusting people wasn't easy; but maybe, just maybe, she could learn to trust Tenko.





	1. Less Than Friends

**Author's Note:**

> Story named for the Arcade Fire song of the same name.
> 
> Takes place in an alternate universe in which the DRV3 characters are in their first year at Hope's Peak.

“Himiko, right?” Tenko said. “I’m Tenko Chabashira. It’s a pleasure to meet you.” Himiko knew who she was – they had those awkward self-introductions only a few hours prior. And yet, for some reason, Tenko went out of her way to reintroduce herself to Himiko at lunch.

 _Weird_ , Himiko thought. Not like she had any right to think other people were weird.

Himiko muttered something at the half-way point between agreeance and confusion, and cursed in the back of her mind for not being able to come up with a coherent response.

“I heard you’re the Ultimate Magician,” Tenko said. “That’s pretty cool! Think you could show me something sometime?”

“Nyeh…” _Don’t say I’m the Ultimate Mage. Don’t say it. Don’t say it._ “I’m the Ultimate Mage. But… maybe I could show you something, if you want.” If you want? Tenko just asked her to. Of course she wanted Himiko to show her a magic trick. Himiko wished she could cast a spell and redo this entire conversation, but of course, she’d probably just find another way to screw it up.

“Wow, a real life mage,” Tenko said. “That’s amazing! Hey, can you shoot fireballs? Can you fly?” Out of anybody else’s mouth, those words would reek of sarcasm, but Tenko spoke them with a bizarre sincerity that almost made them appear genuine.

“If I have enough mana,” Himiko said. Wait, in the first place, why was this incredibly pretty, obviously sociable girl going out of her way to interact with Himiko?

“I see,” Tenko said. “I hope you can show me sometime.” She reached out her hand towards Himiko. “Why don’t we be friends, and I can be the first person here you show your magic?”

Ah. That was it.

Tenko was taking pity on her. She had an ulterior motive. There’s no way such a beautiful, outgoing girl would naturally want to be Himiko’s friend. She must’ve seen that poor, delusional girl about to eat by herself at lunch and felt bad for her. That’s why this is happening.

Himiko reached out and shook her hand. She couldn’t help but notice how soft and warm Tenko’s hand was.

“Okay.”

* * *

 

Himiko thought back to elementary school. She didn’t have any friends back then. Not for lack of trying, no; she wanted more than anything to have people to eat with at lunch or to play with at playtime, but for reasons beyond her understanding, she was ousted. The other kids called her ‘weird’, ‘gross’, and when she went back home to talk to her mom about it, she talked about things Himiko didn’t fully grasp at the time. Like ‘autism’. That was a word that got tossed around a lot. Himiko didn’t know what it meant till a few years later.

She wished she had known sooner that she was born different. Born _wrong_. Then she wouldn’t have wasted all that time wishing she was like the other kids. It was a wish that would never come true.

Tenko was different too – but in the good way. The kind of different that made her interesting and made people want to approach her. Some people might think she was weird, but those weren’t people worth being around, Himiko thought. Maybe she wanted to be like Tenko. Maybe she wanted to _be_ Tenko. Maybe she _liked_ Tenko. It was hard to tell.

Himiko wanted to be friends with her other classmates, too, but approaching other people was almost impossible. Sure, she was friendly with some of them – Gonta, Kaede, Angie – but forming a deeper connection wasn’t something she was capable of. She didn’t know the right words, the right actions. She was just somebody on the sidelines.

“Himiko,” Tenko said, breaking Himiko out of her daze. “What’s wrong? You’ve barely touched your food.”

_What’s wrong is that I can’t understand why somebody like you is trying to be friends with somebody like me._

Himiko looked into Tenko’s bright, caring eyes, her gaze filled with warmth, if that was something that a gaze could be filled with. It almost made Himiko’s heart skip a beat. Almost.

“Nyeh… I’m fine.” She lazily poked at the muck sitting in front of her. “I’m just not hungry.”

“Okay,” Tenko said. “But make sure you still eat, alright? I don’t know much about being a mage, but I don’t think it’s a good idea to cast magic on an empty stomach.”

_Don’t laugh. Don’t smile. Can’t let her know how I feel. Can’t let her know that I **like her**._

Himiko felt something akin to a jolt of electricity, but she didn’t let it show. She couldn’t. Tenko shouldn’t know how she feels.

_She doesn’t care about me. She doesn’t even like me. How could she? She just pities me. She talks like this to everybody, I think. I’m just some boring, ugly sadsack. I don’t deserve her, not even her pity-_

Himiko stood up and slapped both of her cheeks.

“I need to use the bathroom,” Himiko said. “Don’t wait up for me.”

“Um… okay,” Tenko said. “Take care.”

“Mm.”

The bell rang while Himiko was still in the restroom. She took a few moments to sit on the toilet and try not to cry.

* * *

Himiko thought back to middle school. She had friends then. Well, “friends”. A group of four or five girls had invited her to sit with them at the lunch table, and they hit it off well, Himiko had thought. Himiko connected with one of them in particular. She was kind, caring, dependable – a lot like Tenko, in hindsight. She made Himiko feel in a way that nobody, guy or girl, had ever made her feel before, and Himiko cherished every time their hands brushed together or their gazes met for a brief moment. They were the best of friends.

Or so she thought.

They confronted her outside of school one day, all in a group, while Himiko was backed up into a corner. Himiko could never forget what they said to her that day.

 _Stop acting all chummy with us. Now everybody thinks we’re_ actually _friends with you. We only invited you cause a teacher told us to. None of us like you. You’re boring. You’re weird. You’re gross. No wonder you don’t have any friends. Stay away from us._

_And stop looking at me like that._

Himiko decided that having friends probably wasn’t worth it after that.

But now there’s Tenko. Tenko, Tenko, Tenko. Caring, friendly, dependable, strong, passionate, beautiful – the exact opposite of her. Himiko wished she could be friends with her, but she knew better than to let it show – the moment she showed who she really was and let it all out, it was over. Tenko would leave her. Just like the others.

“Hey, Himiko,” Tenko said. They were in Tenko’s room, after classes. Himiko wasn’t sure about it, but Tenko insisted. They had known each other for over a month. Hanging out in each other’s rooms was only normal, right? Himiko wanted to be normal, even if it was impossible. Maybe sitting on your friend’s bed and being overwhelmed by how much it smelled like her wasn’t normal. Himiko tried to ignore that.

“Mm?”

“Are you okay? You haven’t said a word in the past ten minutes.”

“Nyeh…” Himiko wanted to say something, but she couldn’t find the words. What was she _supposed_ to say? What did Tenko _want_ her to say? She wished she knew. She wished she knew what anybody was thinking.

“Have I been talking over you?” Tenko said. “I’m so sorry! If there’s anything you wanted to say-“

“No, it’s… I’m…”

_I’m different._

_I’m autistic._

_I’m a lesbian._

_I like you._

_I think I **like** you._

_I’m **not like** you._

**_I’m not normal._ **

**_Stop pretending that I’m like you._ **

**_Stop pretending that you like me._ **

**_Stop taking pity on me._ **

**_Stop it._ **

**_Stop._ **

“… I’m hungry.”

“That’s cause you’re not eating enough at lunch time,” Tenko said. She hopped out of bed and stretched. Himiko tried to avert her gaze as Tenko’s shirt lifted slightly and Himiko could see more and more of her back, though she wasn’t doing a very good job. “C’mon, let’s head to the cafeteria.”

“Nyeh… We don’t need to do that just for me…”

“But I want to.” Tenko stretched out her hand for Himiko to take, and Himiko was reminded of when they met. “C’mon. It’ll give you some mana… I think.”

Himiko reluctantly reached out, and as they walked, she tried not to focus on the warmth of Tenko’s hand and the sweatiness of her own.

* * *

End of classes. Finally. Now Himiko could leave, go into her dorm room, lock the door, and flop down into bed and forget that everything and anybody else existed.

Or at least she could’ve, if she hadn’t run directly into Keebo while rounding a corner and spilled out all the contents of her partially zipped-up backpack all over the floor.

“Sorry about that,” Keebo said. If robots could blush, he would probably be doing that. Himiko hastily scrambled to pick up all of her things, books and magic supplies alike, and Keebo bent down to assist. “Let me help you.”

“Nyeh… You don’t have to…” Himiko said, which Keebo promptly ignored. It only took a few seconds to pick up everything and return it to where it belonged, but Himiko’s embarrassment and anxiety made it seem like an eternity.

_Thank him. Thank him. Thank him._

Keebo nodded and smiled, and walked off past Himiko. Both remained silent, even if Himiko wished she could power through her anxiety and say _something_.

“Himiko!”

_Shit. Tenko._

Had she seen that? She must’ve, right? Even if she hadn’t seen Himiko bumping into Keebo like a fool, she definitely must’ve seen Himiko making an ass of herself and not even thanking him for helping. Himiko wanted to cast a spell to open a trapdoor under herself, and she didn’t care where it went.

“Are you alright?” Tenko said, kneeling down to Himiko’s level. “Did that degenerate male hurt you?”

“Nyeh… He was just helping. Keebo’s not a degenerate. I’m not even sure he’s male…”

“Well, that’s true… But even still!” Tenko stood up straight and put her hands on her hips, as if lecturing Himiko. “You have to be careful around guys like that! You never know what some degenerate male is gonna try to do to a cute girl like you!”

_Cute. Tenko is calling me cute._

Himiko sighed and pulled down her hat, in an effort to hide the obvious heat in her face. She was too easy, she thought. Any hot girl compliments her and she gets all blushy-crushy.

_Well, maybe it’s not because it’s a hot girl doing it._

_Maybe it’s because it’s_ Tenko _doing it._

“I’m… I’m not cute,” Himiko said.

“Of course you’re cute,” Tenko said, kneeling down and reaching out to lift up Himiko’s hat so they could make eye contact. “You’re the cutest girl I know.” Himiko felt as if the warmth of Tenko’s sweet words and bright smile could burn a hole straight through her. Rather than being comforting, it was much the opposite.

“Stop it.”

“It’s true. I’ve never met a girl cuter than you, Himiko.”

“I said stop it!” Himiko stepped back, wrenching her hat from Tenko’s light hold on it, and fixed her gaze on the floor, desperate to avoid looking at Tenko. “Stop saying things you don’t mean! Stop acting like you care about me! Stop… Stop pretending that you and me are friends!”

The words escaped Himiko’s mouth faster than she could think about them, and it took a moment to process that she had just blurted all that out to Tenko’s face, while a crowd of onlookers surely heard her. After a few moments of silence, she finally looked up to see Tenko’s expression, partly confused, mostly hurt, and it took every ounce of willpower she had not to burst into tears right then and there.

Without either saying a word, Himiko rushed past Tenko in the direction of the dorms and didn’t look back, her fight-or-flight response definitively choosing flight. Tenko, for her part, was left standing there dumbfounded, watching Himiko run into the distance as bystanders whispered and raised eyebrows amongst themselves. She didn’t give chase.

* * *

What time was it? Six PM? Nine? Maybe it was already in the AM hours. Himiko didn’t know. She didn’t care. All she had been doing since she rushed into her room and locked the door behind her was lay in bed with the lights off, mostly napping, crying, hyperventilating, intensely thinking, and some combination thereof. She hadn’t eaten anything in quite a while, and it was starting to become aggravating, but she dared not venture outside her room.

Knock, knock, knock. A rapping at her door. Perhaps it was Gonta, here to talk at her about bugs while Himiko daydreamed, or Kokichi, ding-dong-ditch master that he was.

“Himiko? Are you there?”

_Of course it’s Tenko, idiot. Why would it be anybody else?_

“I’m sorry that made you uncomfortable. I swear I won’t do it again. Please, just talk to me. I want to make it up to you.”

_And she thinks it’s her fault. Of course it’s not. I’m the idiot here, not her. I always say the wrong things and do the wrong things and make people hate me. I’m the worst._

Long pause.

_Maybe she’s gone._

“Himiko?”

_Wishful thinking._

“I’m going to wait for a few minutes. After that, I’ll leave, and I won’t bother you anymore… But if there’s anything I can do, please, just talk to me.”

Fifteen seconds.

_C’mon, get up. Say something. Do something! Am I really gonna let her get away like this?_

Thirty seconds.

_Maybe this is for the best. I don’t want to hurt her. At this rate, that’s all I’m doing. It’s best if she leaves and forgets all about me._

A minute.

_I like her. More than I’ve liked any other person before. I wish I could show it, and tell her that, and let her know just how much I like being with her._

Two minutes.

_It’s selfish of me to want to keep being friends with her. She deserves better. People who actually trust her, and let her know how important and wonderful she is. I don’t trust anybody._

Three minutes.

_But I want to trust Tenko._

“I’m leaving now. Sorry to bother you.”

With dexterity she had never demonstrated before in her life, Himiko flung her sheets off and rushed towards her door, flinging it open with so much force that it seemed like it might fly off the hinges. There, she saw Tenko, as promised.

“Come in.”

Tenko paused, then smiled. Himiko both loved to see Tenko smile, and hated the fact that she was the reason that Tenko stopped smiling in the first place.

One way or another, Himiko would have to rectify that.

* * *

Himiko’s room was better described as “Himiko’s mess”. Magic supplies, haphazardly placed clothes, both dirty and clean alike, and miscellaneous items were scattered around with little regard for placement or order. Himiko had gotten used to it, but Tenko had to carefully tiptoe her way through the room in order to avoid stepping on anything. Himiko took a seat on her bed, while Tenko awkwardly stood in front of her.

“C’mon,” Himiko said, patting the space next to her. “Take a seat.”

“O-Okay,” Tenko said, doing just that. “Thank you for having me.” After sitting, Tenko paused for a few moments, apparently waiting to see if Himiko would speak, before speaking herself. “So… I’m really sorry. I pushed it too far when I shouldn’t have and made you uncomfortable. If there’s any way I can make it up to you-“

“No.”

“N-No?”

Himiko didn’t entirely understand why she said that. She just blurted it out.

_Isn’t that what got me into this mess in the first place?_

_Oh well. Guess I have to roll with it._

“Nyeh… It’s not your fault. It was never your fault. I…” Himiko sighed. “I thought you didn’t even really like me. I thought you were just taking pity on me cause I didn’t have any other friends. Like you were forcing yourself to hang out with me.” Himiko looked down at her lap. Her hands were shaking. “And I thought, if that was the only reason we were friends… Then it’d be better if we weren’t friends at all.”

Tenko sighed, as if releasing the breath she had been holding for the last minute. “That’s a relief,” she said. “I thought you hated me.”

“There’s no way I could hate you.” _After all, I love you._ Himiko pushed that thought into the back of her mind and hoped it would stay there.

“I think we’ve both been making assumptions that aren’t right,” Tenko said. “So let me say this loud and clear.” Tenko gently grabbed both of Himiko’s hands with her own, calming Himiko’s shaking, and looked directly at her. Himiko returned her gaze. “I want to be your friend, Himiko. Not because I pity you, or anything like that. You’re a great girl, and I’m lucky to know you.”

Even though Himiko had thought she cried herself dry earlier, she could feel the waterworks starting up once again.

“I… I want to be your friend too, Tenko…”

Himiko had tried to make a rule out of not crying in front of other people.

She’d have to make an exception this time.


	2. More Than Friends

Nikujaga. Today’s lunch. A meat, potatoes, and onions dish stewed in soy sauce. It was mostly potatoes, and Himiko wasn’t a particular fan of that, but she’d stomach through it today. Not like she had many other options. Potatoes were nice, certainly, but they weren’t her first pick for what a dish should primarily consist of. She’d much rather be eating a healthy portion of meat, but that was the thing least available in nikujaga.

Really, Himiko was just trying to focus on anything other than the fact that she was eating alone at lunch while Tenko happily chatted away with Kaede on the other side of the cafeteria.

She shouldn’t be bothered, she thought. After all, it’s not like she was entitled to Tenko’s time. Tenko was allowed to have other friends. Tenko being friends with other people didn’t stop her from being friends with Himiko.

_But I’m still bothered that she picked Kaede over me._

It made sense. Tenko and Kaede smiled and laughed and seemed to have the time of their lives simply chatting together. Himiko couldn’t give Tenko that kind of conversation. It was no wonder that Tenko would rather spend time with Kaede, really. Himiko had nothing to offer by comparison.

She sighed and tried to push those thoughts out of her head while idly poking at her nikujaga till the lunch bell rang.

_Tenko wanting to talk to Kaede doesn’t mean she hates me or anything. I know that. We’re friends. Even still, I can’t help feeling jealous. Tenko is my number one, and I wanna be hers in turn… So the fact that she would pick somebody else over me hurts. I know it’s not her fault. It’s my fault for being stupid and wanting to monopolize her. I’m a bad friend._

_Nyeh._

She wasn’t doing a very good job of it.

It’s not like Himiko was oblivious to where these feelings of possessiveness stemmed from. She was crushing on Tenko; that much was obvious. Seeing Tenko talking with a bright and beautiful girl like Kaede only made Himiko more and more aware of how undesirable she was. If Tenko liked girls (well, of course Tenko liked girls, but if Tenko _liked_ girls), she would definitely want to be with somebody like Kaede. Or Kirumi. Or Tsumugi? Maki, maybe. But probably not Miu or Angie, even if Miu had the leg-up on Himiko physically. Tenko didn’t like either of them.

_So I rank sixth out of eight. Guess that’s worth something… If Tenko would even want to be with a girl._

Himiko sighed, got up, threw out the rest of her lunch, and wandered both the halls of the school and the halls of her mind as she tried to think about anything besides Tenko and what kind of girl Tenko would want to hook up with.

* * *

“Hey, Himiko. Why don’t we go hang out at the park this Sunday?”

The words rung through Himiko’s head again, and again, and again. Tenko had asked her to hang out at the park near the school on Sunday. Just the two of them, hanging out. A date.

_No, no, not a date. Don’t think of it like that. It’s not fair to Tenko._

But even still, it was impossible for Himiko _not_ to be excited. She hadn’t gotten to spend much quality time with Tenko since she got lost in her own thoughts thinking about Tenko and Kaede. She spent ages fussing over her outfit, vowing to wear something sensible and even somewhat _fashionable_ for once. For once, she actually had to brush her hair, rather than scruffing it up a bit and hoping for the best. These were normal things for teenage girls to worry about, certainly, but they weren’t normal things for Himiko to worry about. It was exciting. Hanging out, just the two of them.

Or so she thought, till she saw Tenko approaching the meetup point with Shuichi in tow.

Her smile and optimism: gone.

“Hey, Himiko,” Tenko said. “Sorry I’m late.” _You’re not late. I was just early._ “I had to go pick up this degenerate first. Hope you don’t mind him tagging along.” _I do mind. It was supposed to be_ our _thing. Why did you bring him? Am I not good enough?_

“Nyeh… It’s fine…”

“Sorry for intruding,” Shuichi said. That expression he wore under his hat didn’t seem entirely comfortable, but Himiko probably wouldn’t feel comfortable either if somebody had just called her a degenerate.

“Well, let’s get going,” Tenko said. Himiko hopped up out of the bench she had been sat in and followed behind Tenko, who led her and Shuichi. “I think this is the first time I’ve seen you without your school uniform, Himiko. That outfit is super cute.”

“Nyeh…” _Thank her. Thank her. Thank her._ “Thank you…” _Okay, now say she’s cute too._

Himiko awkwardly rubbed the back of her neck. Certainly, Tenko was cute. Her off-the-shoulder shirt and jeans certainly did more to accentuate her cuteness than the outfit consisting of a t-shirt and a skirt that Himiko had cobbled together from the few clothes she had that weren’t stage outfits. The comparison was like night and day. No wonder she wouldn’t let herself be seen in public with Himiko alone.

“You’re cute too…”

_Wait, no. Pull it back._

“Er, no you’re not.”

_Not that far back!_

“Your outfit is cute. That’s what I mean.” In her peripheral vision, she could swear she saw Shuichi staring at her, utterly dumbfounded. Not like she could blame him. This entire exchange was definitely going into the vault of memories that keep her up at night, wondering why she ever thought it was a good idea to say that.

“Aww, thanks,” Tenko said.

“Where’re we going, anyway?” Himiko said. Best to change the subject as soon as possible.

“Nowhere in particular,” Tenko said. “I just thought it’d be nice to walk around a bit.” Great. _Walking._ One of Himiko’s least favorite things. Only below loud teenage boys and embarrassing herself socially.

“Least it’s a nice day today,” Himiko said. The only time she had ever seen more birds in her life was the last time she did a magic trick that went out of control.

Himiko realized that Shuichi hadn’t said anything the whole time.

He seemed more invested in whatever was on his phone than what Tenko and Himiko were talking about. He had stopped to give her the stink eye earlier, but otherwise, the only thing he was contributing was his presence. Then why was he even here? Eye candy? Maybe Tenko liked guys like that. He did have that sort of “pretty boy” appeal. If Himiko were straight, maybe she could appreciate it.

“Alright,” Tenko said, gesturing towards a bench. “You guys wait here. I’m gonna try to find a bathroom.”

 _Why don’t we just go with you?_ Himiko dare not ask, out of fear of receiving an obvious and sensible answer and looking like an idiot. She looked over to Shuichi, and he just shrugged.

Himiko and Shuichi took a seat, and Tenko sped off into the distance, like she had been holding it in for a while but didn’t want to show it till now. They sat there in awkward silence for a few moments before Shuichi spoke.

“So, Himiko,” he said. “We haven’t really spoken much, have we? I’m Shuichi Saihara, the Ultimate Detective.”

“I know.”

“And you’re the Ultimate Magician, right?”

“Yeah.”

“… I see.”

_Why am I so bad at this?_

“Are you friends with Tenko?” Himiko said. Now that she thought about it, she couldn’t remember Shuichi and Tenko hanging out… well, ever.

“Ah… No, not really. I was surprised that she invited me, to be honest. Sorry if I’ve been awkward so far. I’ve just been trying to get a feel for both of you before I speak up.”

“So why are you even here?”

The words escaped Himiko’s mouth faster than she could even think about them, and instantly, she was hit by a strong wave of embarrassment; unfortunately, she had no hat to hide behind, so she was left awkwardly averting her gaze from Shuichi and hoping he wouldn’t get too mad.

“I’ve been wondering that myself,” Shuichi said. “Based on what I’ve seen so far, I think Tenko has strong feelings either for or about you, but she’s afraid of expressing them in a strange way if the two of you were alone in a setting such as this. I’m here just to make the atmosphere less… ‘date-like’, so to speak.”

_Wait, what?_

“Ah, sorry, it’s probably not my place to be saying all of this,” Shuichi said, scratching his neck. “And anyway, this is all just my assumptions. Take it with a grain of salt.”

“I see…” Himiko said. “So this is the power of the Ultimate Detective, huh…?” She muttered.

“I’m not that great of a detective, really,” Shuichi said, but his words barely registered in Himiko’s mind. She was too busy staring at the ground and trying not to smile. In her peripheral vision, she could see Shuichi’s face, and later she would remember that he was smiling.

“I’m going to go,” Shuichi said, suddenly standing up. “When Tenko comes out, tell her that a case came up and I’m going to investigate.”

“Is that true?” Himiko said.

“No,” Shuichi said. “But Tenko doesn’t need to know that.” Shuichi walked off to parts uncertain, and thus Himiko was left alone, sitting on a park bench alone like a loser. She didn’t really care, as she was too busy being elated by Shuichi’s conclusion.

Himiko sat there, her mind racing, for a few more minutes before she saw Tenko approaching in the distance.

“I’m back,” Tenko said, causing Himiko to jump a little with shock. Tenko looked around, confused. “Where’s Shuichi at?”

“Nyeh… He said something came up, and we should go ahead without him.”

“Oh. Huh.” Tenko pondered for a moment, then shrugged while sighing. “Oh well. You wanna go get something to eat?”

“Yeah. Let’s go.”

Himiko was trying to act casual, but the reality was that she was giddy with excitement. She had no reason to doubt Shuichi’s intuition; after all, he was the Ultimate Detective. If what he said was true, there was a very real possibility that Tenko returned Himiko’s feelings, and it was all Himiko could think about for the rest of (what was effectively) their date.

They talked about meaningless things – Tenko kept going on about this up-and-coming idol’s music, something Maizono – and they ate inoffensive food. That wasn’t important. What was important were the nuances in Tenko’s behavior, like hastily scooting away whenever Himiko got too close, or not being able to stop herself from smirking a little when their hands brushed together. They were signs. Signs of a teenage girl with _strong feelings_.

_Shuichi was right._

* * *

Shuichi was right… but Himiko never stopped to consider that him being right didn’t necessarily mean what Himiko wanted it to mean.

It at all started at Hope’s Peak, as most things do. It was only for a few seconds, but Himiko had caught a glimpse of Tenko walking and chatting with none other than Rantaro, unanimously voted the hottest guy at Hope’s Peak by adoring fans everywhere, while on their way back to the dorm. If there was any guy at that school that anybody into guys would wanna be with, it would be Rantaro. He was one decent haircut away from being a model.

Of course, Himiko quickly got over that line of thinking, as she realized it was dumb to assume that every person that Tenko interacted with was also a person that Tenko wanted to smooch. Again, Tenko was allowed to have other friends. It was just Himiko’s jealousy at work.

But Himiko also realized that she had also overthought what Shuichi told her. Shuichi only told her that Tenko had “strong feelings” – but strong feelings of what? Himiko had jumped to love, but it was very possible that Shuichi was actually talking about feelings of friendship, and Tenko merely didn’t want to overstep her boundaries and assume the two of them were closer than they actually were. After all, Tenko thought Himiko hated her only a short few weeks ago.

Her smile and optimism: gone. Again.

Worst of all, Himiko still didn’t even know if Tenko actually _liked_ girls.

So what if she _did_ want to smooch Rantaro after all?

Himiko realized she had been standing in the middle of a random hallway for the past minute, thinking herself in circles and surely not looking like the brightest person to bystanders. This cyclical, unproductive thinking was getting her nowhere. It was time for action.

_Otherwise, I’m just gonna keep seeing her talking with random people and getting in these dumb thought spirals forever._

* * *

A few days went by. Himiko needed that time to charge her mana, so she could cast a “get Tenko alone and talk with her” spell. The casting process involved sending Tenko a text message saying that Himiko wanted to talk to her about something in private, and asking if they could meet in Tenko’s room. It drained much of Himiko’s energy, but it went off without a hitch.

Of course, _saying_ they should meet up and talk was a lot easier than actually _doing_ it, and it took all of Himiko’s courage not to turn tail and run when she found herself standing in front of Tenko’s doors.

_Deep breaths. Deep breaths. What’s the worst that could happen? She starts to hate me because she thinks it’s gross that I have feelings for her?_

Himiko realized thinking about it was the worst thing she could do and knocked on the door. She only had a few moments to gather herself before it creaked open.

“Himiko,” Tenko said. “Come on in.” Tenko moved out of the way and gestured for Himiko to walk in, which she hesitantly did.

Compared to Himiko’s room, Tenko’s was neat, orderly. She had her ducks in a line and her books on Neo-Aikido in a row. Her walls were plastered with motivational slogans, and her closet door was open, revealing what must’ve been more than a dozen gi. Himiko didn’t bother to ask why she needed that many.

“Take a seat,” Tenko said, taking a seat herself on one end of a kotatsu, apparently prepared just for this occasion. Himiko sat, and set her hat off to the side. Now was no time for hats.

“So,” Tenko said. “What did you want to talk about?”

“Nyeh…”

_I wanna be your number one. The most important person in the world to you. It’d kill me to see you dating somebody else when I never even told you how I felt. Shuichi says you like me, but I dunno if you like me in the way I like you, and it’s frustrating. I wanna stop being jealous when I see you hanging out with other people. I want to be your girlfriend._

“Nyeh, it’s… complicated.”

“That’s okay,” Tenko said. “Whatever’s going on, I wanna help you out. I promise I won’t think any less of you, no matter what it is.”

_Well, you say that now…_

“Nyeh… I guess I should start by saying…” _God, this is embarrassing. Why didn’t I just confess by text instead?_ “I… I like you. A lot. I know I don’t show it that well, but I really cherish all the time we spend together. You’re kind, and friendly, and motivated, and you’ve stuck with me even though I’m an idiot that doubted you, and… I’m really glad I came to this school and met you.”

Himiko looked over and saw that Tenko had lit up like a Christmas tree.

_Oh yeah. That’s why._

“Aww, Himiko,” Tenko said. Her voice faltered, and it seemed like she was tearing up. She placed both of her hands on her chest. “Thank you. I know how hard it is-“

“Hang on,” Himiko said. “I’m not done.”

“Huh?” Tenko said. Once again, flummoxed.

“I like you, and I know you like me, but… There’s more to it than that. I thought that just knowing that you and I were real friends would be enough, but it’s not. When you smile at me, or when I see you talking with other people, or when you bring other people to things I thought were just gonna be for the two of us… I get this pain in my chest that I can’t make go away. You’re so beautiful and wonderful, and I’m afraid somebody else is gonna notice that before I can say anything, so…”

Himiko’s stare had been directed more and more towards the ground over the course of her speech (more like a rant, really), and at this point, she was entirely affixed on the kotatsu, with Tenko nowhere in eyeshot. That made it just a little bit easier to say what she would say next.

“Basically, I love you.”

Then, there was silence. Tenko didn’t say a word. Himiko didn’t dare raise her head, out of fear of what expression Tenko would be wearing. Disgust? Anger? Definitely not joy.

“I-I mean,” Himiko said, desperate to break the silence. “I know it must not make you happy to get confessed to by somebody like me, but I just wanted you to know… I’m sorry, I know I shouldn’t have said anything, but I couldn’t keep it in any longer… Please don’t hate me… I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry…”

Himiko was entirely choked up, and it was hard to force out the words, but she couldn’t stop herself from letting out a stream of apologies. She was far too focused on apologizing and thinking about how stupid of a move this was to notice the sound of Tenko’s footsteps, and as she was in the midst of her tenth “sorry”, she was interrupted by Tenko crouching down and pulling her into a sudden hug.

“T-Tenko?”

“Don’t worry, Himiko,” Tenko said. “I’m glad.”

“Really…?”

“Yeah. I’m glad you confessed first, cause I dunno if I was ever gonna be able to work up the courage to do it.”

“Huh?”

Tenko backed up a bit, her hands on Himiko’s shoulders. They were eye-to-eye, and while Himiko was definitely red as a tomato, she had somehow managed to avoid crying. Tenko was a bit red too, but she was smiling.

“Honestly, I think I’ve had a crush on you ever since we first met,” Tenko said. “And it’s only gotten stronger since I got to know you. You’re so caring, and passionate… Deadpan sometimes, but I like that side of you too.”

“S-So, you want to…?”

“Yeah. I wanna be your girlfriend.”

Himiko wrapped her arms around Tenko’s neck, pulled herself in, and hugged her so hard it seemed like she was trying to break her.

* * *

“Hey, Himiko, keep up!” Tenko called out, a few feet in front of the short magician.

“Nyeh… It’s too hot to keep up…” Himiko said. It was Tenko’s idea to come out to the park when it was a bajillion degrees outside, after all.

“Then I’ll just have to pull you with me,” Tenko said, coming back over to Himiko’s side and grabbing her hand, entwining their fingers together.

“H-Hey, knock it off,” Himiko said.

“No way. I held back for so long. I even invited that degenerate Shuichi to our date just so you wouldn’t think I was weird. No way am I gonna hold back now!”

“Nyeh… People are staring at us…”

“They’re just jealous cause I’m dating the cutest girl in Hope’s Peak and they’re not.” Tenko smiled and giggled.

“No way,” Himiko said, using her free hand to grab the rim of her hat and pull it down a bit. “After all, _you’re_ definitely the cutest.” Both of them paused, then smiled at each other, laughing.

They walked together, hand-in-hand, into an uncertain future. Himiko wasn’t sure where they were heading. Maybe Tenko didn’t know either, but that was alright.

They’d figure it out together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Every love story I write ends up coming out pretty much the same, but regardless, I hope you enjoyed this one. It was kind of cathartic to write.
> 
> I might end up rewriting this one from Tenko's perspective. It'd allow me to focus more on the "being gay" part, rather than the "being autistic" part. We'll see.


End file.
